There is a time in a mans life when he has to just cringe and bear the experience when things are not quiet in his control.
This time is no more evident than when he or his family find a suitable prospective and the the first meeting between the parents is pending...tick tock, tick tock!
Well you have to face it, its two parties not knowing anything about the other, the guys parents will want the Queen Sheba and the girls parents would want King of Oman on their doorsteps, so as you can expect, expectations are high and the odd adrenalin and stress rush in up a notch coming into the day.
Think are even more difficult if you like the girl and then the parents are introduced at a later stage, that is called in trading strategy as a Bull who has an appetite of a risk prone Del Boy!
This situation can play mind games on the hardest of Men folk (which for obvious reason I am, understandably I can see from the nodding in agreement from the avid readers of the blogg - if they know me that is).
Parents have expectations and that you cannot deny them. They want the best for their children and when they see their sons and daughters growing up to become Men and Women of the World it is natural they don't want anything tarnishing the lives of their beloved, so they do a lot of due diligence to mitigate the risks.
Due Diligence in my neck of the woods coming from a Bangladeshi sub Continent background means the following:
-Assessment of the quality and potential issues or risks with the counterparty (Is she or he "functional"?)
-Any Sub-prime counterparty risk (this equates to if the female or male have been upto no good)
-Assess the quality and risk of the parent and sibling counterparty and exposure (This can be in many form, looking at previous records of transactions from well known credit worthy families or people alike) I must add the past is by far no way an accurate predictor of the future but nevertheless it is a trend that needs to be taken into account).
My parents have always had it in mind that for quality inspections to be of a well informed variety, the prospective bride and her family are to come from the same side of Bangladesh almost to the point that they cannot be from a 10 mile radius. Well that would work really well if I was in Sylhet, in my forefathers backyard, but it is a very different kettle of fish when its in cosmopolitan city of London. Though they are very different now and coming to terms with geography back home and how it has little impact today.
I suppose I can see from their point of view as, someone in Tyneside may speak and act very differently to someone in Hampstead Heath. It comes down to what you know and have experienced, and thats what fears are built up on - the lack of.
-Whether the two counterparties can agree on a deal and come to compromises (There should not be a dominant counterparty that rules or else that will drive the lesser counterparty into submission)
-Look for tell tale signs of the behaviour at the meeting of parents and families of other folks, do they appear "normal" or does something appear rather "strange"?
- First impressions and feeling I think count a lot, its what nurture has built within our individual core due to past experiences so should def not be neglected. Take note and substantiate I say on these feeling esp. if they are negative.
